I can't seem to fall asleep, feel like popping a few pills but if I do, I would not be able to wake up in time to go and buy my new phone and also to go to Rafiqah's sister's wedding.
Yesterday, I fell asleep eventually even though I was not supposed to. Woke up at 5 in the afternoon when I was supposed to meet Wan and the rest at 3pm. Received alot of messages and alot of missed calls, sorry baby(s)! Bathed and all, rushed over to City Hall as Wan, Bong, Don and Din were already there waiting for me. Snapped alot of pictures today, had dinner at Qiji and slacked at Marina steps. To my place after that as we wanted to get ciggs and stuffs, took 17 to Pasir Ris park and we slacked till morning. Had breakfast at MacDonald's. Cabbed home.
Now, the question is :
Is it better to be attached or single?
Sometimes, when I go out and see couples so crazy in love, totally oblivious of whatever's happening around them, I get jealous. Because sometimes, just having someone who'll lend you a shoulder to lean on, having someone who you can just hug without any why(s) is a very nice feeling. We all need someone, someone who can just support you whenever you feel like falling, someone to accompany you whenever you feel lonely, someone who belongs to you and someone who makes you feel like you're in this world for a purpose and that you'll never be alone.
But then again, when I think of all the complications and restrictions one can get from a relationship, I get pretty much turned off. I am eighteen this year, but I can assure you that I have gone through much more shits than most eighteen year olds would.
I do not need a guy with alot of money, I do not need a guy with a car/bike and also I do not need him to be very goodlooking. All I ask for is a him who would always be honest, understanding and who would feel that I am the reason for him to live his everyday, a someone who would be able to sit with me for hours and just enjoy each other's company without saying a word.
I have only truly loved two person(Andi, Afiq) in my entire eighteen years, only two and yet both of them brought me back to where I started. You know, it sucks when you find out that the both of you are not made for each other only when you've spent so many years with that someone, and after putting in so much effort hoping that you guys would stay together forever.
I am not blogging about this because I am emo-ing, but I am just wondering, is it better to be attached or single?
Okay, I've said my piece.
Am gonna get some shut-eye now :)